Even the Motivated Need Motivation Sometimes

I work out. A lot. There is a strict schedule I follow to make sure that I get all of my exercising in. I exercise currently exercise around 10 hours a week.  I do not stray from this schedule and never let the thought of going out to eat instead of working out become anything more than a passing thought. You would think that after 100 days, yes I have finally reached the magical 100 days of working out at my new gym, that I would not be hard on myself and lose motivation but I do. I do because I track everything I am very aware of my physical progress. Every single day I weigh myself and record it...in two different graphs. One graph shows my progress since joining my gym and the other one tracks progress since changing my diet. Both of them motivate me and derail my motivation depending on the day and my mood. I am not a big girl, I have lost most of the weight that I wanted to so I understand that progress will be slow, especially since I lift heavy weights and work very hard to build muscle. I want to be strong and fit but there is a little part of me, the insecure part that wants to be a hundred pound skinny, skinny girl that the media tells me is the ideal. Feeling not good enough all the time is exhausting. I know better, I know I need only be the best possible me and not a skinny someone else. I'm working on it. Back to what I was saying, I lose motivation sometimes because of a numbers I keep recording. Below are both of my graphs.

The top on shows progress for the past month and a half...not very impresive. The botom graph is over the past 118 days and looks a little better. There are quite a few big spikes in that graph. These are after coming back from a weekend away where I did not exercise and enjoyed many, many tasty foods. I am ok (just ok definetely not ecstatic) with the weekend spikes. Life is meant to be lived and enjoyed and I do not feel that a person should deprive themselves of foods they love...every once in a while. The problem with these weekends are that they are stalling my progress. These weekend indulgences should be fewer and farther between and they will be...after this weekend...and maybe the 4th of July weekend...and maybe...and maybe...I need to get this under control soon. Challenge accepted.

When I start to feel like there is no point to all of the hard work I do to become the healthiest and fittest me I think about how far I have come and where I am planning on getting. This helps get the focus off of where I am right now because right now I am changing and progressing, even if the graph doesn't always show it. The weights that I lift keep getting heavier which means I am getting stronger. My boyfriend is a great motivator as well. He works out almost as much as me and we use each other for motivation. It is a lot harder to skip a workout if I know I will be the reason he didn't work out and vice verse. I also find a great deal of motivation on Pinterest. I will find images that resemble my goals and quotes that speak to me. There are many quotes that I will repeat to myself when I am feeling weak while lifting weights or running. This helps me to keep going. One of my favorites is "Of course it's hard. It's supposed to be hard. If it were easy everyone would do it. Hard is what makes it great". This one keeps me going, pushing me further because I want to be great.

I am about to head out to boot camp but before I go here are some motivating quotes/pics to inspire me and you...Now go, get out there and get healthy, happy and fit!

Why I Relay

Why I Relay

Before I was born cancer killed my grandmother. I remember being little and listening to my mom talk about her. I always felt that it would have been wonderful to have had the chance to know the woman my mom spoke so fondly of. Cancer robbed my mom of her mother and me from ever getting to meet my Grandma.
When I was little there was nothing better than going to my Grandparents’ house for the holidays. It didn’t matter that it was a three hour drive or that back then I got car sick just looking at a car. It was my favorite place to be. My dad has a big family and I loved the wonderful chaos that came with the family gatherings. I remember my Grandma’s hugs. She always hugged you like she really, really meant it. Cancer killed my Grandma when I was thirteen.
I will never forget the day Trav’s (my boyfriend) mom, Elaine, told us she had lung cancer. It was devastating and felt as though the world had sort of stopped. All the worries and stresses of being a young parent in college seemed far away and insignificant. Elaine is a fighter though and after going through all of the awful cancer treatments it seemed as though cancer was a word we could put behind us. Unfortunately that wasn’t the case; she was diagnosed with breast cancer. This year she has beat it and I will forever be in awe of her strength and positivity.
Trav’s cousin Tish was diagnosed with breast cancer this year. She is a wonderful woman and a mother of three beautiful girls. She has gone through so much ridding herself of this terrible disease. It’s so difficult to see this and feel so powerless to help. She went through chemotherapy and is currently recovering from a mastectomy. She recently found out that she will need more chemotherapy after her radiation treatment. To me this is outrageous. She has gone through so much and yet cancer is not done making her suffer. She is an amazing woman and I know she is going to beat this. Her strength is an inspiration.
I know that there is a better way to treat this disease, a way that doesn’t torture those who have it. We can find a cure, we just need to come together, pool our resources and not quit until a better treatment and cure are discovered.  This is why I am walking in the American Cancer Society's Relay For Life.

http://main.acsevents.org/site/TR/RelayForLife/RFLFY12National?px=27339998&pg=personal&fr_id=39245